god

A serene masterpiece

I was walking to the railway station after a tiring day at my office and I found every petite thing making me feel annoying. I found the station flooded with people and at that very instant I was haunted with the thought of how my approximately half an hour travel to home is going to be. I peevishly moved along the counter and got my tickets hardly after 15 odd minutes.

As I moved towards the platform I heard the sweet automated voice of a lady announcing the departure of the train that in another 5 minutes. I hurried through the mob and finally got into the train. I felt a huge sigh of relief. I pooled over the compartment of people and found some space to fit myself comfortably which was near the other end of the exit. I wearily leaned over the rear of the passenger seat. I could feel gust of wind brushing my hair viciously along with the speed of the train.

I slowly rolled over my eyes catching the glimpses of the crowd inside that compartment. At that very instance my eyes were found  glued up with a girl. She might be in her early 20’s. She had a good profile. She was wearing a blue jean with a vibrant kurta which increased her dusky skin tone and revealed her tranquilly attractive. She was sitting opposite to me so that she is quiet noticeable to me apart from the entirely distracting crowd. I suddenly had an urge to watch her more intensely as I found myself being hooked towards her for some mysterious reason.

I had to move aside a little to get her clear view. I, usually, am quiet interested in noticing every innate details of a person and even now am focusing over her to find more of her. She had an earphone on her perfectly shaped ears and was hearing some sad song I thought as her face looked quiet unhappy. She had no much make-up to make her good-looking face look synthetic. Her lip gloss which perfectly merged with her complexion gave a perfectly natural look. She had kajal and eyeliner around her eyes which made her small eyes look appealing. She had a pale brown eyeball in the middle of her purely white eyes which made her eyes look stunningly beautiful when she rotates her eyes every now and then.  God! She is quiet a girl I whispered.

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Suddenly she was found restless. I couldn’t still resist looking at her eyes and I could see her eyes getting moist and she literally had tears in her eyes which she was trying hard to stop but finally lost in her battle and a drop of tear rolled over from her dazzling eyes and fell over her cheeks followed by another drop of tear which she abruptly stopped with her beautiful long fingers. She must be in some pain I thought. What-so-ever be it, in my whole 26 years of life I haven’t seen a girl crying so gracefully and I fell so in love with her tears. I haven’t ever thought even in my dreams that a girl’s crying could be so beautiful and I would actually get melted in along with her tears. I have seen many girls cry and I would find them look weird with tears in their eyes which will ruin their face make-up and then you could guess the rest. But this girl was such a painting and I found her totally graceful and an impeccable creation of God.

But I felt bewildered to see a girl crying in a public place not anxious about the people around her over some anonymous song or it might be some other reason too. What is more surprising was I am actually not concerned over her reason for the tears but instead I was just admiring her beauty even in her melancholy. I am in no state to go and ask her the details regarding her pain behind her tears being a complete stranger which would leave her baffled with a pang over me for watching her all this time. Thus I chose to be a silent spectator. I spent the rest of my 10 minutes with her by just watching her humming over some song from her playlist with a cute smile along with a sting of pain lingering in her eyes.

The train halted at my station and I alighted with a nostalgic feeling. When the train slowly started to move I just turned back and got a glimpse of her serene face and found her deeply immersed in her songs which left me with a sweet smile over my lips and a peace in my heart. Women are sure a stunning painting of God with mixed emotions, I thought once again as I walked back home happily.

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Marriage advisers…

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Marriage…. A word which I am hearing very often these days from each and every single person I meet…

“Hey, when are you getting married?”

“Have you ever got an idea to get married?”

“What’s taking you so long to get married?”

“Are you in relationship with someone?”

“Do you have any problem with your horoscope?”

Many such questions from every single person, be it my friends, relatives, known or even unknown… But I am like “Hey, what’s wrong with you all… And why the hell should I get married so early when I have so much to do in my life”

Marriage is a word which has become kind of scary these days and it’s because of the various advices given to me without my consent…

Let’s look few of it…

Advice 1:

Some aunty from relation: Go to temple every day. Only God will help you get married soon. Try to continue fasting on shasti’s. It will help you give a very good husband just like you expected”

Me: Oh… Sure aunty! (Does God own any wedding consultancy or website where he helps girls pick up a bridegroom as they expect?) Instruction outlawed.

Advice 2:

Married Friend of Mine: “Hey you have so much of time for marriage so make a better choice unlike me. Try analyzing the assets and financial position of him and you need to know the entire background of him which will help you lead a peaceful life”

Me: What??? Am I taking a survey on the bridegroom’s financial position or am I going to be his wife? Its shocking that if every single girl chooses according to this and how would the guys with less financial state is gonna get married. Strongly disagree.

Advice 3:

Another married friend of mine: “Look, never marry a guy with in-laws and specifically who has a sister. My husband actually speaks for more than an hour with his sister every single day and it pisses me off. How on earth could I bear my husband speaking with other women in front of me for hours? At least you be careful in making a choice”

Me: OMG!!! Are you saying these for real? How the hell do you expect a brother and sister to not speak? And do you even have a mind… what on earth has got into you for comparing the siblings in such a bad term… Hope you get to live your life with sense of mind girl. Totally shocked and I never want to hear such instructions anymore because I love being a family.

Many such instructions are been given to me over my marriage and I think none of it is actually going to be happening with me.

Marriages are made with a sense of togetherness and not with the Pooja’s/Fastings, or Financial status or their family bond…. Follow your own instincts and not such annoying advises.

Bicentennial thoughts!

Its 7th of March… By now each year right from my childhood I would be excited over the forthcoming day with bigger expectations and butterflies flying constantly over my whole body and a restless-sleepless night for the big day… Yeah… Am speaking of about my BIRTHDAY… I was born on 8th of March which I found later to be WOMEN’S DAY too which offered me a double -treat. My birthday’s were never a cheerful one nor a gloomy one and its resolved to be stabilized with a kind of nostalgic feeling over the whole day all through my life and I was not able to make out the reason for it even now and finally fixed it that it’s all my thoughts that makes my day good or bad.

So I planned of presenting my vivid and murky thoughts on the Birthdays I have spent all these years 🙂

March 8th 1988:

I was born in a Private hospital with 2kg weight and all that happened is everyone out there were freaking out looking at me. Guess what? They all had various reasons and individual thoughts for freaking out. But I could sense out their mind voices like:

Father’s Mom (Grandmother) – “Bapprae… It’s a girl baby… I expected it to be a boy baby… Worthless soul”

Mother’s Mom (Grandmother) – “Thank god! Both the mother and the child are alive… It’s a god’s miracle for this child still being alive after so much of physical weakness of her mother”

Uncle & Aunt – “Hey look at the child… How could a child be like this… I haven’t seen one with so tiny physic and wrinkled skin like an old lad… There might be some problem with this newborn I guess”

Relatives – “Oh God… Why does this baby has to be a girl… It would be better if it’s a boy… How is she gonna grow up a girl child alone with her husband died of accident… God must help her…”

Mother – “Thank god! The baby is fine… And thanks to you my dear for helping us be alive today… I vow to bring this child well and bring in glory to your name… Do rest in peace my dear husband”

Doctor – “Hey all… Stop pouring out your remarks… I need to take this baby to ICU as she’s under-weighted and struggling for breathing… If-not she will never survive… It’ll take around a week to make this baby all hale and hearty…”

March 8th 1991:

I was all dressed up in a white frock and looked like an angel (no no please cool down guys… Just for an example) with a box filled with toffee chocolates and two unopened packet of same chocolates and full of smiles…

I was in my kinder garden and it was my first birthday with so much of people around me gathered for a birthday song in the prayer hall… (It’s a custom in my school to sing a birthday song for the Birthday Babes after the prayer is over)

March 8th 1992-1999

I would probably get a new dress for my birthday and I used to wear it with full cheer and carry chocolates with my face full of teeth to each of my friends in the class and teachers by bunking half a day to distribute sweets to all the teachers in my school… I would be the princess of that day with all those wishes and blessings from everyone…

And at home needless to say I will be paid off well with money from every member of the family… You know I would fall in each of their feet on my birthday not for blessings but for the money they would give me… And I also used to get few memorable presents from my dear friends…

March 8th 2000:

I was in my 10th grade and just then I realized one biggest thing in my life which changed my life a lot… Every year I used to pressure my mother to buy me a new dress for my birthday with a chocolate kept fixed in my mind right from December itself… I didn’t think it’s a bad habit…

But on this particular birthday I was wearing a fancy salwar with all those embroidery works and was carrying my box full of chocolates and was ready for my usual session of distributing to each and every one. But then I realized that it was the day one of my new classmate Ranjani’s birthday too… But I found her in school uniform with no change. I was puzzled… And even many don’t know it’s her birthday… When I went up to the stage for birthday song, I found her standing down in the corridor with other students and singing the birthday song for me.

After that I started my usual distribution and in the lunch break once I got free I found her eating some curd rice as if that day got nothing to do with her. So I went up to her and asked for the reason. But she said as she forgot that it was her birthday. I was not in a mood to argue with her that time as I was about to share some special lunch with all with sweets. So I left it as it is.

But after few days on some sudden occasion I was enquiring about her and there came the answer as “she was from a poor family and her parents were not able to buy her new clothes or sweets for her birthday from childhood and though she would feel like wearing new dress and distributing sweets like others she was laid back to be without any of these due to her family situation”…

Hearing this I felt really bad and was not able to reply her anything and I felt how much my so-called-birthday-celebration that day might have bothered her little heart. So then I realized that I must no wear new dress on my birthday and celebrate like I did all these years never knowing how this would have hurt so many little hearts like Ranjani’s.

So I did followed this and I haven’t even asked my mother for a new dress or chocolates or cakes for birthday and stopped having so much dreams over that day from December… But as my friends knew that it was my birthday they will present me with gifts and wanted me to offer them sweets so I used to give them a diary milk each and treat in the school canteen. But that day I gave two chocolates and a special gift to my friend Ranjani and I would treat her especially for she is one important person for a biggest change in my life…

March 8th 2001-2011:

My life has totally changed to a different atmosphere after the schooling… I went for my graduation where the celebrations might be different with midnight calls for birthday wishes and friends buying a cake for the birthday babe and we all get-together into an empty class for cake-cutting-ceremony with all the galattas, getting punishments from staffs, giving treat to friends and so on… But though I had all these I would be sure not to wear a costly dress for my birthday and to be simple on that day so that it would not hurt any of my friend’s feelings.

And after that in my job also the same cake-cutting-thing happens but this milieu is totally different and I guess I was happier spending my birthday with my friends rather than my colleagues and I even feel shy for all these celebrations but it’s an unavoidable one as the management rule is like that to celebrate for all…

March 8th 2012:

Gone are those days of sunshine and cheer and left are the days of panic and dreary birthdays… It’s all because OH MY GOD…. I AM GETTING OLDER AND NO MORE A BABY OR KID OR A DAUGHTER…

It’s time to take up a new road in my life’s path… It’s going to be hard though but it’s the usual path all the girl child needs to choose by destiny… So better to get ready for a cheerful future… And not knowing what this birthday has kept for me in the stadium, yet I am ready to wait for looking over it… A NEW YEAR WITH NEWER HOPES…

My Clicks!!!

Hi friends!!!

I have tried a different effect on the pictures i have taken recently. Guess this kind of effects comes out really well for few pictures and not all. I really enjoyed editing these 🙂 🙂 🙂 Do look over it and provide your valuable comments 🙂

The Dragonfly...

On a lonely afternoon...

The lonely deity

The tired family resting in shade...

Innocence – Expression Week

Innocence is the question? 
Innocence is the X factor? 
Innocence is life mortality? 
Innocence is sinless state immortality? 

Innocence is physical perfection? 
Innocence is purity soul divinity? 
Innocence is state of grace harmony? 
Innocence is Trinity creation link eternity? 
Innocence is life breath immortality? 

Poem by Terence George Craddock